Hunter S. Thompson: On Sportswriters

“Sportswriters are a kind of rude and brainless subculture of fascist drunks whose only real function is to publicize & sell whatever the sports editor sends them out to cover…

Which is a nice way to make a living, because it keeps a man busy and requires no thought at all. The two keys to success as a sportswriter are 1) a blind willingness to believe anything you’re told by the coaches, flacks, hustlers and other “official spokesmen” for the team-owners who provide the free booze… and: 2) a Roget’s Thesaurus, in order to avoid using the same verbs and adjectives twice in the same paragraph.”

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